The men's travel movement.

As of late, I've been giving a lot of attention to why there's not more of a men's travel movement. I mean, Google women's travel and you'll find gobs of articles and websites that promote women's travel. Retreats, solo trips, group trips, women-centric trips that focus on empowerment and transformation, you name it, you'll find it. Google men's travel and you'll find websites that sell men's travel bags, gear, clothing, etc., but the first thing you will NOT find is anything about men's only travel trips.

I don't get it, yet again I do. Since women's liberation became a "thing", women have been forging ahead in the workplace, politics, home life, within their personal endeavors as well as in travel. Women have been on the rise long before we have been given the freedom to do so and now, we are seeing women transform themselves and redefine themselves over and over again, fearlessly in every aspect of their lives, including travel, while still raising children, holding down jobs and having careers. 

Let's look at men and travel. . .

Men have been given the societal role of the breadwinner, the provider if you will, the rock of the family that works to support his family.  Noble as that role is, it leaves little time for self-discovery, personal fulfillment and growth. If a man has a wife and kids, it's usually the woman's idea to take a trip;  the man usually  hops on the wagon and approves the plan and he goes along for the vacation, rarely having much input in what HE wants from his travels. Rarely have I heard of a situation where the man initiates a family or couple's trip; don't get me wrong, there are some men who take the lead but more often than not, it's woman-lead. And rarely have I heard of a man say to his wife, " I really want to take a trip, just by myself, and explore." 

When we travel, we expand our perspectives, our ideas, our hearts, our souls, we deepen our views of the world and the people and our relationships with them. Women are leading the way in the travel world and you can imagine what that is doing for their over all sense of well-being and personal growth. Women are expanding themselves, finding confidence in their abilities, getting inspired, wanting more from life meanwhile, the noble bread winner, the "rock", continues his role and stays stagnant in his growth.

 I recently spoke with someone who said she lead trips to Central America for women and what she found astounding was that after these women returned from their travels, many of them got divorced. Why? Because they were inspired by what they had experienced, the people they met, the local women who were doing more with less, and they came home to discover that they had outgrown their relationship. The men couldn't understand the change in their women. The couldn't conceptualize it nor could they relate and the bridge between them became wider thus creating problems in their relationships, such problems that would ultimately become the demise of their marriage.

As a woman, I find this a tragedy because as much as I promote growth and transformation for women, it makes sense to be an advocate for men's personal fulfillment. Without men's personal growth and genuine happiness, there will be a lot more couples going their separate ways and a lot more family's being dissected. I've seen it happen time and time again ~ the women evolve beyond measure and they leave their men behind. Men and women need each other but we also need to be on the same emotional  playing field otherwise we'll continue this trend of women forging ahead and men wondering what happened to their lives.

Okay, so what do we do to change this?

We women want our men to be happy beings. We want them to feel fulfilled in all aspects of their life. We don't wan them to feel and act as though they are the martyr in their lives. We want to feel connected to them. We want to be inspired by them. Women want a man who has challenged himself for the sake of himself. We are attracted to men who have blazed their own trails and who have come back with stories to tell and raw emotion attached to the stories.  If you're a married man or have a partner and you discuss the idea of you traveling on your own and WHY you want to travel on your own, chances are you may get more support and encouragement than you'd expected to get, especially if your partner has traveled on her own, she will understand your reasoning. 

Women, it's great for your men to travel and have experiences away from you. It's okay if they aren't thinking of you and your kids 24/7 while they are gone. It's okay for them to delve into their experience and feel alive in their own skin again for it is in that new skin they will return home a deeper, more connected version of the man who left. Support him to travel, dream a little with him and encourage him to take care of his own dreams as well as the dreams of his family. 

Single men who feel stuck in their careers or in their personal lives, I say this to you: Go travel! Find something that calls to you and then go do it. You may find that what you needed to get un-stuck was to challenge yourself,  to meet someone new and  to find inspiration in your newly gained confidence of having taken the leap to shake yourself free. 

Men, my message to you is this: 

It's okay to take care of you and your dreams. It's okay to ask for time off from work and your family and get a new perspective.  It's okay for you grow emotionally, spiritually, and every other way possible. There is nothing weak about heeding to the calls that you have stifled over the years. There is nothing scary about outgrowing your wings and slipping on a new pair that allows for a greater flight through life. The only thing frightening is trying to soar the skies you were mean't to live in without enough wingspan to get you ( and keep you) off the ground. 

Be the one who starts the movement of men traveling. Be the one who takes the time to travel and have adventures that most of your friends would never dare to do but who often fantasize about doing.  Be the guy that comes back to his job and his family with such enthusiasm for life that simply being around him is an inspiration to become better. Be the guy who encourages others by his own acts of self-love. Be the guy who's  kids want to hear your tales of your adventures. Be the guy who cares enough for himself, his family, his life that he will allow himself to be a priority. 

It's a slippery slope for a woman to suggest that a man do certain things because in my experience, most men do not care to be told what to do but if you listen to anything, listen to this: 

TRAVEL.  

Get the funk out of your life, hit the reset button, unplug, detach from all the weight you hold onto  in order to reattach to your authentic self. . Your life will thank you. 

When you are ready and want to start planning, call me. I'm in your corner and I fully support your endeavors. You'll never find a bigger cheerleader for men's travel than you'll find with Viva la Vida Travel. 

Travel like your life depends on it.